What good is having cake if you don’t eat it too?

May 14

Ayyyo, its my birthday! 🎉 And while the number might be inching higher, I'm taking a moment to reflect on the journey so far and, of course, to re-introduce myself to those who might just be stumbling upon my corner of the internet.

I understand the first impression I often give. If you didn’t know me, you might expect to show up to my birthday party and see nothing but salads, fresh fruit, artisanal green drinks, and a chocolate cake made with dates and avocados. If this is the picture you have of me, you are way off! I love entertaining and making food the centerpiece of the event.

An edible history

For me, food isn’t just about fuel. It is about the sensory link to culture, our lived experiences, and the moments that have shaped me. Since this is such a cornerstone of my philosophy as a dietitian, I wanted to take you on a brief history of how food has shaped me.

For me, it all starts with the smell of chocolate chip cookies fresh out of the oven. I have been in the kitchen for as long as I can remember. Growing up, a common after school activity was helping my mom put together our afternoon snacks followed by prep for dinner. Some days this meant we got to bake chocolate chip cookies. The smell of a chocolate chip cookie transports me back to time when my biggest stressor was learning how to write my name. Elizabeth is not an easy one to master when you are 5! I am reminded of dropping my bag at the door and running into the warm, loving embrace of my mom who had an afternoon of fun lined up for us. Cookies don’t represent calories to be counted or unnecessary sugar to be avoided. They represent comfort, connection, and a reminder that sometimes the simplest things in life can bring the most joy.

I haven’t always been the food mogul you see in front of you today. As a kid, I was a very picky eater. I basically lived on peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. I was so picky, that I can recall with great detail the first time I ever added lettuce to a sandwich because that was a BIG step for me. It was after a tennis tournament and I went to a sandwich shop with friends. They were all adding vegetables to their sandwiches and I didn’t want to feel left out. So I decided to add lettuce in an attempt to fit in. I was pleasantly surprised to learn that I actually enjoyed the slightly crunchy texture and mild sweetness. It wasn’t at all the slimy, bitter, green thing I had talked up in my head. I now laugh when I hear people talk about iceberg lettuce lacking nutrients. For me, it had nothing to do with nutrition. The addition of lettuce was a step out of my picky eating and into a bold new world of flavors.

Fast forward to my time working in college athletics where most championship seasons happen over holiday weekends. This meant that not only did I miss going home for the holidays, but so did my whole staff. I will never forget my first time hosting a staff Thanksgiving. Everyone brought their favorite dish and we all shared a meal of combined cultures and traditions. To this day, I still incorporate some of the dishes that were shared that day in my own holiday meals. That shared meal was about learning from each other, trying new things, and building a deeper connection through food.

Takeaways

Thanksgiving shouldn’t be about the turkey trot before the meal. Intentional movement is great, but if the purpose behind it is to burn off calories so you can actually enjoy the meal you are about to eat, you have already missed the point. If you are focused on food rules at landmark events, you are missing out on what the food represents. It isn’t about calories, it is about connection.

We don’t always have to search for the most nutrient dense food on the menu and choke down kale just because it has more vitamins. Sometimes food is about leaving a comfort zone, not about it’s nutritional content. Cookies aren’t a food to be consumed with shame and atoned for later. For some of us, they can be a reminder of simpler times and provide the embrace of a loved one even if you are miles apart. These moments for me aren’t about being healthier or finding a love of vegetables. They were about community, connection, growth, and a sense of belonging.

My birthday wish

I know it is taboo to share a birthday wish if you want it to come true. But you aren’t mind readers and this one feels worth sharing.

This birthday, my deepest wish is for all of us to rediscover the simple, unadulterated joy of eating. I want us to move away from the noise of diet culture, the constant judgment of food choices, and the overwhelming guilt that can so often accompany a delicious meal.

Think back to being a child. Remember the pure delight of those chocolate chip cookies. Somewhere along the way, for many of us, that innocent enjoyment got tangled up with rules, restrictions, and a whole lot of unnecessary shame. We started labeling foods as "good" or "bad," associating certain meals with guilt and others with virtue. It's time to untangle that mess.

My birthday wish is for us to reclaim our right to enjoy food without a side of anxiety or self-depreciation. Food is meant to nourish us, yes, but it's also meant to bring pleasure, comfort, and satisfaction. It's a fundamental part of the human experience, and it's okay – more than okay, it's essential – to savor it.

This isn't about abandoning mindful eating or ignoring how food makes us feel. It's about approaching food with kindness and curiosity, rather than fear and judgment. It's about recognizing that a balanced life includes room for all kinds of foods, enjoyed without guilt or the need to "earn" them.

So, this year, let's make a conscious effort to silence the inner food critic. Let's savor the flavors, appreciate the textures, and relish the experience of eating simply because it feels good. Let's celebrate the deliciousness that life has to offer, without attaching moral value to our food choices or letting them dictate our self-worth.

My wish for you, and for myself, is a year filled with more food joy and less food guilt. Let's embrace the pleasure of eating, nourish our bodies with kindness, and remember that true well-being encompasses both our physical health and our relationship with food.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go enjoy a slice of birthday cake – guilt-free!